


All of You

by SuggestiveScribe



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: First Time, Inline with canon, M/M, Post canon, sex and feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-30
Updated: 2017-04-30
Packaged: 2018-10-26 00:01:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,774
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10775232
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SuggestiveScribe/pseuds/SuggestiveScribe
Summary: But everything felt different here, and Yuuri wasreadyfor something different here. He was ready for everything.Yuuri squeezed harder around Viktor’s waist and a loudpop!sounded from the skillet.Yuuri’s libido was going to ruin dinner.





	All of You

**Author's Note:**

> For [@smallfig_!](https://twitter.com/smallfig_) Thank you for your support, and I hope you enjoy this!

 

 

“You didn’t bring that much Yuuri!” Viktor was smiling, rising back to full height from where he’d just deposited a box on the floor. He wiped his forehead, which was softly speckled with sweat.

Yuuri's eyes fluttered down to the stack of cardboard boxes filled with his belongings.

_I'm used to living in places that aren't Hasetsu._

_I couldn't pack all my posters._

_I want to start fresh here with you._

"I don't have that much," Yuuri said, blinking before bringing his gaze back upward. Viktor was standing there with that same amiable look on his face, sunlight making his blue eyes sparkle. He was wearing a deeply cut black v-neck and tan slacks. Thanks to that Yuuri could make out the pink flush over Viktor's chest and collarbones. It matched the color on his cheeks, burning with the work of having hauled boxes up and down flights of stairs. A slight sheen stuck to Viktor's neck, dried sweat making the sunlight gloss over his skin like the light had been painted there. He looked...

Yuuri averted his eyes. "I uhm—" he cleared his throat "—I'd like your help going through all of this, since I'll be taking up space in your apartment."

"Our apartment," Viktor said, taking two large steps before flopping his arms over Yuuri's shoulders and hugging against his back.

Yuuri's eyes slid off to the side. "You won't even let me pay you properly."

"You couldn't afford half the rent of a place like this," Viktor responded cheerily, chin resting on Yuuri's shoulder.

Yuuri closed his eyes, face going flat and blank, _Thank you for reminding me_.

"And besides, I don't want you to pay rent at all. I don't lose anything by you being here."

Yuuri cast his eyes down to the floor. The scent of Viktor's skin and cologne clung to him. Yuuri mumbled, "I know you've said that, but..."

"But nothing!" Viktor exclaimed. He nuzzled into Yuuri's neck. "I love being with my Yuuri. Making you pay anything seems cruel."

Yuuri absentmindedly spun the gold band on his index finger with his thumb.

"Hey Yuuri, we can put all the bedroom boxes in my room," Viktor chirped, unlatching from Yuuri and moving to pick up a box. Then he paused, sending a quick look over his shoulder, "Unless you... wanted to use the guest bedroom...?"

A strand of Viktor’s bangs fell loose, skimming over his eyes.

"I was just..." Yuuri's gaze slowly pulled away from Viktor's face, "going to put them in your room..."

The smile that split open Viktor's face was indescribably bright. "Okay! I'll put this in there." He padded off with the box, pleased.

Yuuri wouldn't tell him, but it had become difficult to sleep without Viktor's body next to him. He was warm, and he smelled good, and his heart always beat strong and steady beneath his chest.

" _Yuuri!_ " Viktor gasped from beyond view.

Yuuri furrowed his brow at the bedroom entryway.

" _Is this a sex toy?_ "

Yuuri's eyes stretched wide before he stumbled forward, "V-Viktor, I didn't think you were opening--"

A buzzing sound cut through the air of the apartment.

" _Wow!_ "

 

-

 

Unpacking boxes was a relatively smooth process, although Viktor harassed Yuuri incessantly about his... personal items. Yuuri was embarrassed but Viktor wasn’t, and that somehow made Yuuri feel much better.  

Not that Yuuri was surprised. Viktor had always accepted all of him, as is, with nothing but kindness.

Yuuri buried his face in his knees. Viktor was at the kitchen counter, chopping something for dinner. He'd said he would cook dinner to celebrate their first night in St. Petersburg together. When Yuuri had asked if Viktor cooked often he had replied 'Almost never!' with a too-blithe smile.

Yuuri didn't fight him on it though. He had felt as if he'd been running on half-concentration all day, and he could use some quiet to rebalance. Right now that rebalancing included blinking over his knees at Viktor's back, his shoulder blades moving beneath the thin cotton of his t-shirt.

How could Viktor be broad in all the right places and slim in all the right places? Yuuri's eyes dragged down Viktor's back, caressing the curve of his waist as his shoulders tapered into slim hips. His t-shirt had caught on his pants, baring a singular back dimple and hipbone. Yuuri's hands clenched into fists under his legs.

And then there was... the rest of him. Long legs, porcelain skin, a butt he could balance a roll of coins on.

Makkachin whined from where he sat in the entryway of the kitchen. He plodded over to Yuuri and jumped on the couch, resting his head near his legs. Yuuri petted his head compulsively, fluffing the poof of fur at the top of his head. "Did you give up on being equal distance from the both of us?" he asked him.

"Makkachin, I feel abandoned!" Viktor complained from where he stood at the counter, not bothering to turn around.

Makkchin lifted his head with a small noise, looking to Viktor with concern.

"Don't listen to him," Yuuri whispered, continuing his affection. Makkachin laid his snout on the very small portion of Yuuri's lap. Yuuri yielded, lowering his legs so the poodle could properly use him as a pillow.

He immediately returned to gazing at Viktor's back. Squinting, he distantly wondered if _he_ could balance a roll of coins on his own butt. Yuuri reached around to his own backside, giving it a distinct squeeze. Probably not.

He'd look at their pair skate exhibition photos later. Do a proper side by side comparison.

"Dinner will be ready in fifteen minutes or so!" Viktor called over his shoulder.

"Okay," Yuuri responded, voice barely carrying into the kitchen. His eyes were fixed on the nape of Viktor's neck, right below the delicate brush of his hair. He wanted to touch him. He wanted to wrap his arms around his middle and press a kiss right there on his neck, right where he could bury his nose in Viktor's hair. He also wanted to run his fingers up his sides, over his abs, down...

Yuuri was bad at touching. It made him feel awkward and invasive, or like he was being too forward. But having been around Viktor he had started to crave it; he craved the physical contact and the closeness, and he craved showing how much he was thinking about the other.

But he was left craving something he felt he couldn't attain for himself, and it was a bit like torture. Yuuri drummed his fingers against the couch.

He was keyed up. He had been all day and Viktor wasn't helping being so... _Viktor_ , and being here in this new place, a place intimate to him, a place that was secluded and private and _theirs_.

Yuuri rose from the couch, earning a curious head tilt from Makkachin. He strode through the living room and into the kitchen, pausing just behind Viktor. Viktor was turning his head in question as Yuuri set his fingers against that bare slice of skin above his hipbone.

“Yuuri?” he asked.

Yuuri tipped his head forward, letting it rest in the dip between Viktor’s shoulderblades. The shirt smelled like his cologne, crisp and citrus with a tinge of sweet.

“You okay?” he tried again. Whatever was on the stove was sizzling on the pan, exuberantly hot.

“Mm,” Yuuri answered, nodding against Viktor’s back. His hand wasn’t exactly steady, but he allowed his fingers to slide around Viktor’s hip, tracing a gentle line above the waist of his pants.

Viktor didn’t say anything, but when he exhaled it was wavering. “I hope you uh,” he was trying to fill the silence, “enjoy what I made for dinner.”

“Mm,” Yuuri repeated. He wound his hand back toward him, pressing his thumb into the divot of Viktor’s back dimple. When it came time, would he be able to form the words to tell Viktor what he’d been craving?

He pressed into him harder. He thought about pressing him into the counter and sucking at his neck. He wondered what Viktor would do, what noises he’d make.

He’d heard a plethora of Viktor’s noises before in various situations, places, levels of desperation. But everything felt different here, and Yuuri was _ready_ for something different here. He was ready for everything.

Yuuri squeezed harder around Viktor’s waist and a loud _pop!_ sounded from the skillet.

Yuuri’s libido was going to ruin dinner.

Yuuri sighed against Viktor’s back and loosed him from his hold. Viktor was peering at him over his shoulder, eyebrows raised.

“It looks good,” Yuuri commented lowly before turning around and heading back toward Makkachin on the couch. He returned to his curled up form, staring blankly over his knees at the wall.

There was a moment of silence in which Yuuri could feel Viktor looking at him, but he said nothing. When Viktor turned his attention back to the food, Yuuri sighed. He would try and show him, then. He was bad at words and he was bad at touching, but he would manage. His eyes slid back to Viktor’s form in the kitchen.

He couldn’t want something that badly and not try.

 

-

 

Most of dinner was spent with Viktor chatting happily and Yuuri staring at his plate in tension-filled silence. When he lifted his gaze he was met with the bob of Viktor’s throat as he swallowed, his flashing white smile, his silver lashes catching at the fringe of his hair.

Yuuri swallowed a sauteed green pepper and shifted in his seat.

“Yuuri, are you okay?”

Yuuri shook himself. “Yes,” he responded, voice flat. “Today has just been tiring.”

“That’s to be expected.” Viktor’s voice still had a smile in it.

“Could we go to bed early?” Yuuri lifted his eyes.

Viktor’s face was absolutely blank, and Yuuri suspected it was on purpose. “Of course,” he answered with a wide smile, the neutral expression gone before Yuuri could guess what it meant.

Yuuri looked back to his vegetables and tried not to grin. It would be a weird response. “Thank you,” he said, but some satisfaction crept into his voice.

“Mm!”

Yuuri knew Viktor noticed his strangeness. Viktor had come to notice a lot of things, often before Yuuri realized there was something to notice. He had also come to say less about noticing, and Yuuri theorized it was for Yuuri’s benefit. It drove Yuuri mad wondering what Viktor thought, but in the end he was grateful for not being forced to explain himself. Yuuri divulged his feelings when he was ready, and never before.

Although, sometimes it was after.

When they rose from dinner and cleared the table, it was done mostly in silence. When they brushed their teeth, it was done mostly in silence. And when they stood together in a bedroom that was now theirs, looking at each other, it was done completely in silence.

There was the smallest and most gentle smile playing around Viktor’s lips as he looked down at Yuuri. Yuuri was trying not to fidget; he wanted to wring his hands, or pace around the room, or _something_ , but he decided that wasn’t the best way to set the mood. And even though Viktor knew in some capacity that Yuuri was nervous and… riled up, he made no move to do a thing about it. He just waited there, happy and patient, perfectly Viktor.

It pissed Yuuri off a little.

Nevertheless he stepped forward, running his hands up Viktor’s neck and into his hair. Then he kissed him, long and deep, with an inhale that filled his lungs with everything Viktor.

It swirled through him like a drug. It made the top of his head light and dizzy, made the blood in his veins feel like a vortex. Viktor wrapped his arms around him, making it easier for Yuuri as he took a few more steps forward and forced the backs of Viktor’s knees into the mattress.

There were no sizzling green peppers to stop him, none of his own insecurities to make him balk. Now Yuuri could take him like he’d thought about all day, all afternoon, all night.

Viktor followed his lead like it was a dance, falling back onto the bed without hesitation. He grasped at Yuuri’s shirt as he did so, dragging him down with him so he could immediately press their mouths back together.

It was fine. Viktor would understand what Yuuri wanted just like he always did. He didn’t need to be scared or overcomplicate it. He didn’t need to say it in clear embarrassing words.

Yuuri kissed him harder. He pressed their mouths together until it was liable to hurt. He loved Viktor. That was sometimes hard to say too, but he did. He loved him with all of his insides and outsides, and for some reason Viktor loved him back.

Yuuri gasped against Viktor’s mouth and forced his hips down harder, grinding into him. All his limbs were alight with energy. He felt aggressive; he didn’t know where to start or how to begin when he wanted to be everywhere.

His first move was detaching their mouths and digging his teeth into Viktor’s neck. Viktor’s back arched, a noise coming along with it. Yuuri slid his hand downward, over Viktor’s side to drink in the smooth dip of his waist. When he reached bare flesh he actually huffed a breath, the longing in him fully giving way to appreciation. He decided skin was good, and more would be better.

He tugged upwards at Viktor’s shirt, making it stunningly clear what he wanted. Once again Viktor followed suit without pause, tensing his abs and raising his shoulders off the mattress so Yuuri could peel the clothing over his head. Yuuri threw away his own shirt with just as much haste and less grace, yanking it over his head and almost dislodging his glasses from their perch. He discarded the shirt and the glasses, tossing them both to the floor. He shoved himself back onto Viktor, chests colliding. That feeling of skin on skin made goosebumps erupt across Yuuri’s flesh.

For a while he was just touching. His hands were going over smooth muscles and sharp creases of abs, his mouth wandering all over shoulders and pecs. Viktor’s lips tracked downward, kissing the full length of Yuuri’s collarbone before going further and sucking Yuuri’s nipple into his mouth.

Yuuri moaned, head tipping back and cock surging harder in his pants. Viktor licked, kind and chaste, before nipping at the flesh with his teeth. The noises Yuuri made were gasping and frail. Viktor hummed against him, a warm pleased note that didn’t leave his throat.

He could feel how hard Viktor was beneath him, his length straining against Yuuri’s own. Yuuri decided they should be free as well, and went to work on sliding his hand between their bodies and forcing open the buttons of their pants.

A raspy chuckle sounded against Yuuri’s chest. “Eager tonight are we, _Yuu_ ri?”

“You have no idea,” Yuuri whispered, shoving their zippers down. Viktor helped free himself of his pants and boxers, wiggling cooperatively as Yuuri forced them down over his hips. He also took to dragging Yuuri’s off him, and even the rigid slide of fabric over Yuuri’s skin made him shudder.

When Yuuri fit himself against Viktor’s entirely naked body he trembled. Their legs were intertwined, hips pushed flush and cocks nestled against each other. Yuuri dragged his lips over Viktor’s neck, inhaling his scent and tasting the warmth of his skin on his lips.

“You’re so beautiful,” Yuuri spoke against his throat, dipping downward to kiss Viktor’s collarbone. He’d been looking at this sliver of naked chest all day; now he could finally smatter kisses across bared fair skin.

Viktor’s breath hitched, his back curving in a slight arch. _Beautiful_ , Yuuri thought again, mouth wandering downward. He should compliment Viktor more. He should tell him that he daydreams about sliding his tongue over the cut ridge of his abs, down the pronounced V tapering into the hard swell of his cock.

Instead he just did it, watching as Viktor’s back arched higher with every forward advance of his tongue. Then he got to his cock, thick and flushed red and so deliciously curved that it made Yuuri weak thinking about how it must feel. He continued his trajectory, dragging his tongue up the shaft until he was flicking the head with the tip.

Viktor had covered his mouth with the back of his hand, forcing his groan into a slight muffle. But he was watching Yuuri with a riveted gaze, glassy blue eyes fixed on his mouth. Yuuri pressed his lips on the bulb of Viktor’s head, letting them part slow so Viktor could watch them open for him. He was rewarded with a whine from Viktor’s throat and salty drops leaking from Viktor’s slit. Yuuri took him as far back as he could, keeping his lips sealed tight around the shaft. He wrapped his  hand around the base, stroking the unwetted portion of cock in time with his mouth.

Viktor’s breathing was ragged. Yuuri devoured him a few more times before tapping at the comforter with his free hand and extending an upturned palm. Viktor’s only response was more gasping. Yuuri gently slapped at Viktor’s side and repeated the motion.

“Hm? Ah--”

Viktor’s upper body twisted, and Yuuri kept his mouth busy toying with the ridge of Viktor’s head while he rifled through a drawer.

Eventually a small bottle of lube found its way into Yuuri’s palm. Yuuri flicked the cap open and sloppily poured some over his fingers. Reaching around himself, he carefully found his entrance. The moment his finger touched the puckered flesh he pressed inward, opening himself up to the small intrusion.

Yuuri gasped with a mixture of relief and need. It was just enough to scratch an itch, just enough to enhance his craving. He hummed around Viktor’s length, relaying his satisfaction onto Viktor’s skin.

Viktor tried and failed to keep his hips from tipping into the vibrations, but Yuuri took him in gratefully. He loved when Viktor’s composure fell apart, especially if it was in his mouth, under his fingers.

He pulled out of himself just enough to insert another finger, and this time Yuuri allowed himself a moan. This garnered Viktor’s full attention. Suddenly bright blue eyes were staring at him with wide consideration.

“ _Yuuri_ ,” he chided after his face softened into realization. “You should let me do those things.”

Yuuri suctioned his mouth up Viktor’s shaft, sucking hard on the tip before letting go with a distinct _pop_.

Viktor writhed beneath him, his silky voice gone rough.

Yuuri crawled up Viktor’s body with his one free arm, “I don’t want you to do everything.”

Viktor lifted his eyes to him. Red had spilled all over his cheeks and neck, like he was burning from the inside out. “I can help,” he said, touching at Yuuri’s cheek.

“You can help,” Yuuri agreed. He grabbed at one of Viktor’s fingers with his mouth, swirling his tongue around it and leaving it thickly coated in saliva. Then he nuzzled against Viktor’s neck, laying on him almost entirely as he led that finger back to join his own.

Viktor gasped as Yuuri pressed it into him, stretching him wider around the three fingers. Yuuri groaned, the width of the stretch impossible to ignore.

“ _Yuuri_ ,” he said again, breathless. “You don’t usually want three.”

Yuuri was preoccupied tasting the flesh of Viktor’s neck. His body was shaking, the intrusion throwing his nerves into temporary shock. And yet it still wasn’t enough. It wasn’t all Viktor, everything Viktor, and that’s what Yuuri truly wanted.

Yuuri withdrew from himself, leading Viktor’s finger out with him. He winced against the loss, grinding his teeth, but he kept the expression to himself.

“ _Viktor_ ,” he breathed, propping himself on an elbow. He kissed Viktor full on the mouth. He tried for softness but lost grip of the concept the longer he held the kiss, desperation making his nerves dance on serrated edges. “ _I want you_ ,” he told him in a hushed voice over his lips.

“ _Yuuri_ ,” Viktor returned the tone, licking the swollen pout of Yuuri’s bottom lip. “I’m yours.”

Yuuri reached down. Viktor wasn’t fully slicked up and ready yet, but that was okay. He just needed to tell him, needed to tell him without words what it was he needed.

Yuuri took Viktor’s cock in his hand and guided it toward his entrance, stopping when the tip hit the center of his rim. He rocked back against it, the wet from Viktor’s precum coercing his rim to loosen against the pressure. _“Viktor_ ,” he almost choked. He was right there, the warmth of him right there and fitting into his body, so perfectly close.

Viktor’s eyes slowly grew wide. “Oh, Yuuri,” his voice something edging into a nervous chuckle. It was worn thin, like he barely got it out. He gently pulled his hips away, easing the push of his head on Yuuri’s entrance. “Let’s slow down, okay?” his voice was more even this time.

 _I don’t want to slow down_. “But--”

Viktor grabbed his cock, leading it back to where it rested against his stomach. “We don’t have to move so quickly,” he reiterated. He wrapped one hand around the both of their cocks, the other fluttering toward Yuuri’s entrance.

Viktor brought their mouths together as he slipped a finger into Yuuri. Yuuri gasped against his mouth, his discontent breaking for the pleasure of the moment. Viktor began pumping over them, precum making his hand catch and slide over them with teasing inconsistency.

It didn’t take that much; Viktor was already groaning, the foreplay he’d received from Yuuri’s mouth granting him extra sensitivity. When he came it was with a quick buck of his hips and a spike to the arch in his back. “ _Yuuri_ ,” scraped from his throat as he pulsed over the both of them.

Feeling Viktor’s cock throb and jump against his own made Yuuri’s rim flex with impending orgasm. The steady friction of Viktor’s finger inside him was an almost unfair advantage, and soon his entrance was spasming around the intrusion. His hips jerked hard into the clutch of Viktor’s palm and against his length as he came. He cried out incomprehensible noises, and Yuuri wondered why the moan felt so much like a sob.

After they’d both finished and melted into each other, Yuuri blinked back to reality. His head resting comfortably on Viktor’s chest. He rose, tossing Viktor a dirty shirt to clean up the mess on his abs.

“I’m getting in the shower,” he told him, wiping a few smears off himself before approaching the doorway.

“Oh,” Viktor said, popping upright. “Then I can--”

“No, it’s okay,” Yuuri responded, shutting the door behind him.

Yuuri ignored the silence that followed him like a thick heat, turning on the water and concentrating on getting the temperature right before stepping inside.

The shower poured over Yuuri, wetting his hair and forcing it flat over his forehead. The dark strands hung in his eyes, and the water that clung to them seemed determined to make him blind.

He touched his chest. It felt tight, for some reason. Like there wasn’t enough skin to cover the bone, and like there was too much bone to let out the prickling heat inside.

He didn’t realize why until he coughed and tears came with it, muddled sobs weakened by the bleat of the showerhead. He let his face warp and tear itself apart into something ugly. He was alone so he was allowed to be ugly.

He didn’t know why he was crying. He sobbed for a long time, until his eyes hurt and he wondered if the wet on his face was tears or shower water. He sobbed until he was tired, until he could work past the pain to consider the feeling that caused it.

When he realized what it was, his eyes grew hot with tears again. The feeling came back, and it made him rest his head against the wall with tears catching in the wet of his bangs. The feeling was rejection.

 

-

 

“Ah, I’m so tired! Was I this tired after practice when I was younger?”

Yuuri clicked at his controller, eyes anchored to the TV screen. Viktor’s shoes thumped against the entryway as he took them off.

“Yuuri, I didn’t get to see the jump you’d been working on.”

Two enemies appeared on screen. Yuuri clicked to engage in battle. “You were busy talking with Yakov,” Yuuri informed him, voice flat. “I had Mila and Georgi take a look.” The enemy landed a hit, but Yuuri was guarded. “Of course Yurio was sure to offer his opinions as well,” he mumbled.

“ _Aww,_ I wanted to see.”

Yuuri blinked, “I’ll show you tomorrow.”

“Yuuri… is everything okay?”

Yuuri had downed both enemies. He now had the opportunity to destroy them while they were down or appeal to them to join his party. “Yeah,” he answered, launching a full assault at the two foes. “Everything is fine.”

 

-

 

“Oi, what are you doing?”

Yuuri almost detached his gaze from where Viktor stood chattering at Yakov, but he didn’t. Instead he sat still on the bench just as he was, bloodied socks and feet resting against the cold rink floor. “Sitting,” he decided to answer.

“For the past week you’ve been looking at Viktor like you miss him or want to kill him. I can’t tell which it is, but either way it’s disgusting.”

Yuuri brought his leg up to curl one knee against his chest, eyes and expression unmoving. “Don’t you always look at us like you want to kill us?”

“It’s not the same,” Yurio stomped. “I do it because you guys are gross and annoying, not because I’m in love with you!”

_Ah, he’s right._

Yuuri’s face rested more heavily against his knee.

“ _Tch_ ,” Yurio responded. The clunk of guarded skates hit the floor, as if he was turning to walk away.

“He’s an idiot,” Yuuri spoke softly.

There was a pause. At the very edge of Yuuri’s peripheral vision, he could see Yurio turning to gape at him. It was something that walked the edge of surprised and mortified. Another beat of silence followed, and Yuuri assumed he would get another “ _tch_ ”, or maybe a “ _che_ ”, followed by the sound of retreating skates. When Yurio spoke, Yuuri actually turned his head to look at him.

“Viktor’s really perceptive but he’s also super dense,” Yurio responded, almost spitting the words. “The old man can be impossible to figure out.” He leveled an annoyed stare at Viktor, then brought his gaze back down to Yuuri, “If you can’t tell which it is, he’s probably just being an idiot. Tell him what’s wrong or he won’t get it.”

Yuuri stared at him. He didn’t know what to say.

“And if you don’t talk,” Yurio said, pointing an accusing finger at him, “that’s your own damned fault, pig!”

Yuuri raised his eyebrows.

“ _Che,_ ” Yurio barked, turning around. “Sometimes I wonder if all adults are stupid or if you two are just special.” He thunked away from him, somehow still looking graceful as he stomped his feet like a tiny delinquent.

Yuuri looked down at his own feet. After a quiet moment he put his socks back on, unpleasant as that was, and relaced his skates.

“Viktor!” he called with a wave of his hand, sliding onto the ice. Viktor’s head snapped in his direction, bangs twirling around his face. “Will you watch that jump?”

Viktor’s face split into a beaming smile. He bounced to the edge of the rink, leaving Yakov yelling mid-sentence.

“Show me, _Yuu_ ri!”

Yuuri smiled.

 

-

 

Yuuri was sitting thigh to thigh with Viktor on the sofa, coffee in hand. He stared over the rim of his mug and out the window. It was gorgeous; the sun was unadulterated, unfiltered, promising something bright and fresh for the rest of the day.

“What does my Yuuri want to do today?” Viktor wrapped his arms around Yuuri’s middle, nuzzling his face into his neck. “Sight-seeing? Shopping? We need to get you a winter coat and some nice sweaters! Winters here are difficult.”

Yuuri patted his hand against Viktor’s thigh, “I lived in Detroit for years you know. Their winters were--” _Horrible. Awful. Disgusting._ “--unpleasant.”

Viktor perked up, “We’ll see what you say after your first Russian winter!”

“That said,” Yuuri went on, tipping his head up to look at Viktor, “I wouldn’t mind shopping with you today.”

Viktor squeezed him tight, tilting his head forward so their foreheads rested against each other. “Okay! And I’ll take you to this restaurant downtown that I like.”

Yuuri closed his eyes, brushing their noses together, “Mm.”

He could smell Viktor’s skin like this, so warm and sweet that he wanted to taste it. Yuuri opened his eyes and allowed for a small sliver of vision. He looked at the perfect pink sculpt of Viktor’s lips before leaning forward, pressing into them.

_Ah, as I thought. Warm and sweet._

Their mouths opened together naturally, tasting each other. It was dangerous how good Viktor felt against him. He was so gentle, tongue so delicate and taunting as he licked into Yuuri’s mouth.

Yuuri’s hand moved from Viktor’s thigh and up his side, slipping under his shirt and gliding over his ribs. _Soft_. Yuuri dug his nails into the flesh and Viktor gasped against his mouth.  Yuuri shifted then, swinging his leg over Viktor’s lap so he could straddle him. He immediately resumed the kiss, taking his mouth deeply as his hips rocked forward in Viktor’s lap.

Viktor made a noise again, but this one was deeper, more like a growl. The pleasure of it made the noise curl upward into something wolfish and hungry. Yuuri nipped at his lip, barely able to suppress the aggression that made his exhales come out shaking.

“M _mm_ , I like this,” Viktor said between bites and kisses. His voice was low, that gorgeous register that made Yuuri’s hair stand on end. Yuuri dipped his head to suck at the delicate stretch of flesh just below Viktor’s jaw. Viktor’s hips tipped upward into the gyrations of Yuuri’s, and the extra friction granted by Viktor’s cock made Yuuri purr. “Being able to touch however we want, whenever we want,” Viktor continued, breath tickling against Yuuri’s ear. “Being able to make noise…” His hand roamed up Yuuri’s back, sliding along his spine. “How honest you’ve become with what you want.”

Yuuri’s eyes cracked open, eyelashes brushing against Viktor’s neck. Viktor used the pause to capture Yuuri’s ear between his teeth, pinching at the lobe.

Yuuri huffed a breath before leaning back, his hips still undulating in Viktor’s lap.

“Viktor,” he breathed, bringing their foreheads back together.

Blue eyes slid up to him. They were smoky with want. “Yes?”

“I want you,” Yuuri told him. His voice was rough and raspy; it scarcely sounded like him at all.

Viktor inhaled sharply at the words, leaning up to press a hard kiss to his mouth.

“All of you,” Yuuri said after the kiss, only to kiss him again. He ground his hips down harder in his lap, and spoke above his lips, “Right now.”

There was a pause, and as the words gained meaning and weight Viktor’s body appeared to fall into stillness. His breath was feathery and uneven. Yuuri stared at him, right in the eyes.

“Well,” Viktor exhaled with a smile, “there’s no need for all that.”

Yuuri’s stomach barely had time to drop before his insides were replaced with flames. “I didn’t say it’s what I needed,” he bit off shortly. “I said it’s what I wanted.”

“ _Yuu_ ri, there really is no need to move so fast.”

“Is it fast!?” Yuuri demanded, practically leaping from Viktor’s lap to stand in front of him.

Viktor sat uncomprehending and bewildered for a second, the sudden change in mood and motion rendering his eyes large and vacant. He adjusted, crossing his legs to hide the still-stiff boner beneath his slacks. “Isn’t it?” he asked, and to Yuuri it appeared he just wanted to say something.

“No!” Yuuri barked. He too reached down to adjust himself within his pants, pushing his cock hopefully, mostly, out of sight.

“Yuuri,” Viktor tried again, his voice taking on an almost nervous chuckle. “We just moved in together. And you’re already--”

“We’re _already living together_ ,” Yuuri rephrased for him. Heat was stinging his cheeks and his eyes.

Viktor looked down at his lap. Then he shook his head, huffing a sigh, “Our relationship moved quickly and I just… don’t want to rush this part.”

“Did it!?” Yuuri demanded again. “You lived with me for months on end in Hasetsu! We didn’t even kiss until the Cup of China and then… there has been so much, and I bought these rings, and now we’re here--”

“I suddenly showed up and made you live with me in Hasetsu!” Viktor interrupted, voice growing more firm. “I jumped you on the ice for our first kiss!” Yuuri’s brow wrinkled at his words. “I decided to come back to skating and gave you no way to be my pupil without moving to Russia!”

“Viktor--”

“Then I offered for you to live with me and you said yes, but how hard would it have been on you to say no?”

“Viktor, I was just in your lap trying to have sex with you!”

“I’ve been setting the pace this whole time!” Viktor ignored him, almost breathless. “And I don’t want to accidentally rush through things with you.”

“Viktor,” Yuuri said again, voice more level. He held up his hand, making sure he wouldn’t be interrupted. “I am twenty-four years old,” he said. “And I’m a virgin.”

Viktor looked away from him, “I thought that was probably the case…”

“No no, listen,” Yuuri continued. “That doesn’t mean I was without desire for my whole adult life. Believe me, I had them.” Viktor raised his eyebrows at him. “Since I was a teenager, at the very least, like most human beings.”

“Okay…”

“So what I’m saying is,” Yuuri narrated, using his hand to partition the air like it was helping. He tried to think of an eloquent way to say his next thought. He couldn’t. “I’ve been horny my whole adult life.”

Viktor blinked at him.

“I’ve been horny,” Yuuri said again for some reason, “and I have not been able to have sex. NOT because there was no one to have sex with,” he said with a point. “But because there was no one I _wanted_ to have sex with.”

Viktor was watching him. He was quiet, and his face had softened into thoughtful, receptive lines.

“Now I’m twenty-four,” Yuuri continued calmly. “And everything that I have ever wanted in my whole life is sitting in front of me,” he gestured to Viktor.

Viktor reddened, his ears burning to a hot point before it spread to his face and down his neck.

Yuuri sighed, “I want to spend my life with you, Viktor.” Yuuri didn’t look at him; he couldn’t. “I am finally in a relationship, and I have everything I could ever desire, and an entire lifetime of libido greets me every single time you walk in the room.”

Yuuri finally looked at Viktor; he shouldn’t have, because his eyes were glossy and he was staring at him with such shock that it was intimidating.

“It doesn’t feel fast to me,” Yuuri muttered, wrapping up. “It feels like it’s been a lifetime. And it… it doesn’t matter, not really. Not when I’m one hundred percent certain of what I want. So you delaying like this…” Uhg, his eyes were getting hot and watery. “It just feels like… you don’t want me.”

There was a silence. Yuuri looked at his feet, unable to bring his eyes any higher.

“Yuuri… I’m sorry.”

Yuuri closed his eyes.

“I got worried… about what I might be doing to you--”

Yuuri lifted his head, “Making me happy?”

Viktor chuckled, just once, and the wet clinging to his lashes almost gave way, “I just didn’t see why you’d want to rush.”

“I didn’t see why you’d ever think it was a rush.”

The silence again. “Yuuri, while I may not be in your position, experience wise” -- Yuuri squeezed his eyes shut and made a face-- “it will still be my first time… with love involved. So I wanted to make sure I got it right, I guess.”

Yuuri’s eyes snapped open, “ _Huh?_ ”

Viktor was looking at his hands. “Come on,” Viktor said, eyes sliding to the side and loosing a tear to roll over his cheek, “you have to know you’re the only person I’ve ever been in love with.”

 _No_. “No,” Yuuri blurted.

Viktor smiled, and when he blinked another tear flowed down his cheek, “Well, yes.”

People weren’t supposed to be able to cry like that. Crying wasn’t supposed to be pretty. “I… didn’t know.”

“Now you do.”

Yuuri suddenly felt insensitive. He thought Viktor hadn’t been desiring him, or perhaps babying him for his inexperience. It never occurred to him that he might be… nervous.

“I’m sorry you felt rejected,” Viktor said.

“Nn,” Yuuri shook his head, padding over to sit down next to him. He tapped his thumbs together, “I’m sorry too.”

There was a moment of no speech. Then Yuuri turned to him, “Oh, and by the way. Don’t worry about it being difficult to tell you ‘no’.” Viktor’s eyelashes fluttered at him. “Telling you ‘no’ is like my favorite thing,” Yuuri informed him. “I kind of get off on shooting you down.”

Viktor chuckled, “What are you, some sort of sadist?”

“Yes,” Yuuri answered. “If you’d let me have sex with you then you’d realize that.”

Viktor stared at him. Then he laughed, squeezing his eyes shut over drying tears. Yuuri chuckled, his mouth forming a pleased smirk.

When Viktor found his breath again he sighed, “I am sorry, Yuuri.”

“It’s okay.”

Viktor leaned in to kiss him, his lips closed but still soft. Yuuri threaded his fingers into the back of Viktor’s hair.

Yuuri was going to try and stop being so impatient. They’d get there.

 

-

 

“That was such a good dinner!” Viktor said, setting their bags down on the dining room table.

The apartment was barely lit since they’d been gone all day. Right now it was bright gold, cream colors glowing by the illumination of the setting sun.

“Dinner,” Yuuri laughed. “For an old man. The sun is still up.”

Viktor frowned, “Shopping made me hungry.”

Yuuri smiled down at Makkachin as he pet him, “Our Viktor is getting old, isn’t he?”

“When Yurio says it I can ignore it, but when you say it I can’t!” Viktor complained, roping his arms around Yuuri’s shoulders. “Take it back!”

“I take it back,” Yuuri said. “You’re a spring chicken. Fresh off the legendary figure skater assembly line.”

“Silly Yuuri,” Viktor said, dotting a kiss to Yuuri’s neck, “I’m one of a kind.”

Yuuri turned to him, returning the chaste kiss with another, “You are.”

The petulance was now wiped from Viktor’s face. In its stead: a beaming smile. “Let’s take a shower!” he suggested. “Then we can cuddle up for a movie.”

“Good idea,” Yuuri responded, finally forcing himself away from flopping Makkachin’s ears around his head.

“Makkachin, you can’t come,” Viktor told the poodle as he followed Yuuri toward the bathroom. “Last time you took a shower with me it was a disaster.”

Yuuri shot Viktor a quick glance, but decided not to ask.

Viktor was already peeling clothes off, leaving them in a haphazard trail to the bathroom. Yuuri picked them up behind him, tossing all of his and Viktor’s clothing together in the hamper. Viktor was completely naked when Yuuri entered the bathroom. He was also bent over to test the water from the faucet. Yuuri stared at him, had a lot of thoughts, and then turned around to drop his boxers to the floor.

“You’re so lucky.”

Yuuri turned around to where Viktor was looking at him, one foot in the shower and one on the rug. “Huh?” was his best response.

“You have almost no body hair! Japanese men are so smooth and shiny. Like dolphins.”

Yuuri looked down at himself. The only notable hair was the very minimal thatch between his legs.

“I have to shave and trim mine to keep it in order,” Viktor explained. “And I have to shave my legs all the time.”

Yuuri had fallen in love with Viktor’s long and silky legs. It had made him start to shave his own.

“Yours isn’t too wild,” Yuuri commented, walking toward the shower as Viktor finally stepped inside. “Hey,” he asked, pushing aside the divide so he could join him, “do you think Yurio will get much facial hair?”

“Huh…” Viktor said, tapping his index finger to his chin. “He doesn’t seem like the type… but it’s really impossible to tell, isn’t it?” The water rolled over Viktor’s hair and shoulders.

“It’s a weird thought,” Yuuri agreed.

“Imagine,” Viktor said, hair drooping into flat silver planes over his forehead, “Yurio coming in one day with patchy hairs on his lip and chin, trying to grow edgy facial hair.”

Yuuri and Viktor both looked at each other before spraying air from their mouths in huffs of laughter.

“I can totally see him trying,” Yuuri said. “Especially if he wants to look like his grandpa.”

“I hope it happens,” Viktor said, “I can’t wait to hear Mila tear him to pieces.”

“Awful,” Yuuri said through his chuckling.

“Here, take the water,” Viktor said, stepping to the side for him.

“Thanks.” It felt good over Yuuri’s achy muscles. He was achy all the time now. He let the water wash over him, beating against his face and chest. Viktor hummed as he lathered himself up with soap, some bright infectious tune that Yuuri didn’t recognize. It was probably just the soundtrack to Viktor’s head.

When Viktor got back in the water Yuuri watched the soap slide down his body. It had quite a ways to go. Long arms, long legs, chiseled, waspy waist. Yuuri thought maybe he should turn around again. He did.

“Hey Yuuri, can I wash your back?”

Yuuri turned his head, eyebrows slightly raised, “Oh, yeah. Sure.”

Viktor reached behind himself to grab the loofah, squeezing an excess of body wash onto the puff. Yuuri watched the motions with half his attention, turning around when Viktor reached toward him to begin washing.

Viktor’s strokes were gentle and thorough, swiping across the whole of his back with no room for error. He also meandered downward, soaping up Yuuri’s buttcheeks and sliding back up the crack in a quick stroke.

Yuuri jumped, a surprised noise hiccuping from his throat. Viktor _giggled_ \-- a real and honest _giggle_ \-- and then returned to foaming up Yuuri’s sides and shoulders.

Yuuri could have interrupted Viktor to inform him that it was enough-- he was fully lathered up by now, certainly-- but the slow drag of the sponge over his skin was calming. He allowed himself the luxury of closing his eyes, nothing in his mind except the feel of Viktor washing him and the rhythmic sounds of the shower.

Eventually Viktor put down the loofah, and Yuuri opened his eyes and prepared to step back into the water when fingers slid up his back.

Yuuri caught his breath. The glide of Viktor’s fingers up either side of his spine sent tingles through his hands and feet. Viktor continued up his neck, and when he reached Yuuri’s hairline he ran his fingers into Yuuri’s hair. The drag of his nails over Yuuri’s scalp made Yuuri shudder, goosebumps erupting across his flesh.

Viktor kneaded at Yuuri’s neck with his thumbs, pressing tension away from his skull and spine with careful force.

A suppressed breath left Yuuri. Every part of him was relaxing save for one; his length throbbed gently from where it had begun to harden, and Yuuri swallowed his embarrassment. As much as he was sure Viktor would take the response as a compliment, Yuuri didn’t tell him. He would try to calm himself, ignoring how very naked and soapy his partner was behind him.

Yuuri’s shoulders sank, body relaxing against Viktor’s hands. He was roaming back downward, dragging all of his fingers over Yuuri’s shoulders. Yuuri wasn’t sure what he did to deserve such attention, but he was going to enjoy every second until he could return the favor.

Viktor’s touch was soft as his fingers glided through the lather.

“Your body is so pretty,” Viktor told him, sweeping over the curve of Yuuri’s shoulders and down his arms.

Yuuri wanted to argue with him, but he was busy attempting to keep his breaths even. Viktor’s fingers wandered to Yuuri’s sides, grazing over ribs and the inward curve of his waist. It was too delicate; it made blood prickle under the surface of Yuuri’s skin, made him dizzy and shaky with how much it stirred in him.

Sliding around his hips, Viktor pressed his thumbs into the indentations of Yuuri’s back dimples. He rubbed in slow, forceful circles.

Yuuri almost whimpered, his cock stiffening in full at the sensation. So much for calming down.

Viktor massaged his way outward, kneading at his hip flexors and then down to the top of his thigh. Yuuri exhaled.

“I miss the baths in Japan; I’m sure you do too. They really helped with muscle soreness.”

“Mm,” Yuuri attempted a response.

The rubbing ceased and Viktor went back to the slow drag of his fingertips through soap. He went up Yuuri’s thigh, under the curve of his butt, then dragged one finger right between Yuuri’s cheeks and over his entrance.

Yuuri exhaled a noise so soft and wanting that his eyes flew open in shock.

They both froze, the sound having come completely without warning to either party. Yuuri bit his lips closed.  Viktor cleared his throat.

Yuuri began to turn around when Viktor bumped against his leg. Well, a part of Viktor bumped against his leg.

Yuuri glanced down at the hardened length that Viktor had been sure to keep away from Yuuri’s body. When he brought his eyes up to meet Viktor’s he was looking away, face flushed.

Ah, it was hard to describe how beautiful Viktor was in the shower. Silver hair laid flat and dripping over his forehead, silver lashes caught at drops of water. His eyes were a saturated blue in the softer light, like jewels. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled, eyes still diverted. “I just think your body is so pretty, and when I touched it, I--”

Yuuri turned, lifting his chin up, and kissed him. When his body had fully turned to meet Viktor their cocks bumped, and Viktor gasped against his mouth. Yuuri would have smiled if he wasn’t kissing him so deeply that it shook his bones. How could this happen? How could you kiss the same person over and over and still feel like you’ll come out of your skin?

It could have been the first time when it was in front of thousands of people and a live broadcast, or it could have been the second time when it was so tentative and gentle that it made Yuuri’s lips tremble. It could have been the third time, or fourth time, or any time, because every single time Viktor kissed him it made Yuuri’s soul sizzle, and the world fell away.

Yuuri led Viktor’s body, turning them so he could push Viktor against the wall. He pressed the full weight of himself onto Viktor, lifting his chin to lick into his mouth. He wanted to chart his kiss as thoroughly as Viktor had charted his back.

The water hit against their sides, forcing the soap off Yuuri’s body and making their hair stick to their faces. Viktor was gasping as they slid together. Yuuri nipped at his neck, pinching at the sound to claim it for himself.

Viktor’s hand stuttered downward, sliding down Yuuri’s sides and resting on his hips. He pulled him closer, chests so flush even the water couldn’t slide between. Sensations were everywhere, slick and warm, and Yuuri could feel that familiar desperation rattling in his fingers and his chest.

“Viktor,” Yuuri breathed the word, a detached plea.

“Okay,” Viktor said, dipping down to recapture his mouth. He was inhaling Yuuri’s kiss as he fumbled around to slam the water off. Eventually the stream ceased and the fumbling shifted to their feet. Viktor held Yuuri’s hips as they stumbled out of the shower, feet moving from slick and wet to dry and soft. Yuuri couldn’t keep his mouth off him. For some reason he felt like he’d captured something; a rare and tender Viktor that didn’t hide being rare or tender.

Viktor was haphazardly rubbing a towel over their bodies, his motions limited by his determination to keep his mouth all over Yuuri. Lips, neck, ears. He scruffed the towel through their hair and then pressed Yuuri to the edge of the sink, their skin sticking together in partial moisture.

Suddenly he dropped to his knees, mouth taking Yuuri’s full length without a hint of warning. Yuuri gasped, clapping his hand over his mouth the muffle the peal of pleasure that bubbled from his throat. No, this was not how things were supposed to go at all; Yuuri wanted to be spoiling Viktor right now.

Yuuri swallowed. It was so difficult to get Viktor off his knees once he was on them. His determination to swallow Yuuri down was always so much greater than Yuuri’s resolve to stop him.

“Viktor,” Yuuri tried, yanking lightly at Viktor’s hair. He didn’t budge so Yuuri tried again, harder this time. “ _Viktor_.”

Viktor looked up with hazy eyes. His body followed as Yuuri led him upward with the pull of his hand. Once they were mouth to mouth again,Yuuri smiled. He shoved Viktor backward, forcing him through the bathroom door and into the hallway. The shock on Viktor’s face didn’t dissipate before the next shove, and soon Yuuri had him pinned to the wall.

“You’re too giving,” Yuuri whispered against his neck before sucking on it, rolling his hips against him.

“ _Ah_ ,” Viktor’s hips stuttered against his. “It doesn’t feel that way at all.” He flipped Yuuri around, taking hold of his thighs so they could wrap around his waist before pressing him to the wall.

The breath left Yuuri quickly.

Viktor looked at him with dark eyes, his cock sliding between Yuuri’s legs and just below the curve of his cheeks, “I always feel like I’m taking.”

Yuuri groaned at the friction of Viktor’s cock against him as he pressed forward. He head tipped back, hitting against the wall. Viktor’s hips rocked forward and the head of his cock teased against Yuuri’s entrance.

Yuuri hiccuped a breath, precum already spilling from his cock. His body was so greedy for Viktor that it was embarrassing. Viktor huffed a breath, his hips still rocking. It was a recognizable rhythm even to an inexperienced man. Yuuri couldn’t help but imagine it... imagine Viktor sliding into him like this-- Yuuri pinned to a wall, legs stretched up and wide to accommodate all of him. Yuuri whimpered. Viktor fucking into him with this slow and careful rhythm, so wanting…

Yuuri’s rim flexed at the the thoughts, his heart skidding out of time.

Should he ask Viktor to finger him? Just… just for the friction, for a temporary fill to--

“Yuuri…”

Viktor’s cock touched against his entrance again, but this time it was slick, lubed with his own arousal.

Yuuri groaned, rim flinching again. That was too cruel, too teasing.

“ _Yuuri_ …”

Yuuri opened his eyes. Viktor had their faces almost pressed together. His breath was ragged and uneven, his shoulders heaving.

 _I must be heavy_.

Viktor blinked at him slowly, his face bright crimson. Even like this he still had that tender look on his face. Uncertainty sat in his glossed eyes. He licked his lips, “I…”

Yuuri waited, but Viktor’s eyes slid to the side. Then he straightened, Yuuri still wrapped around his waist, and walked to the bedroom. He laid Yuuri gently across the comforter, easing down over him like he was trying to be silent.

Yuuri was blinking at him curiously now. Viktor’s lips were parted, but he wasn’t looking at Yuuri. That was a feat, given their faces were centimeters apart. The world was drawing into evening outside, and the light coming through the window made Viktor’s skin a canvas of sunset colors.

“Yuuri, can I…” Viktor finally dragged his eyes back to Yuuri’s face, “make love... to you?”

Yuuri’s eyes slowly grew wide. _Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Do not cry at the prospect of getting laid you awful creature._

Viktor looked away.

“Yes,” Yuuri finally managed to wheeze. His eyes were prickling. It was awful, truly, but he was overcome with so much emotion that it actually made him tremble.

Viktor looked back to him, and his eyes were happier now, but still so full of self consciousness that it made Yuuri’s chest ache. His exhale was like falling petals or the shudder of butterfly wings, uneven and delicate, shaking gently to the ground.

“Okay,” he said, trying to smile. Yuuri tried to smile back. His limbs were still shivering. “How would you… like things?”

This time Yuuri looked away. “I really wanted my first time to be with you…” Yuuri’s cheeks hurt for how hot they burned, “inside…”

There was a moment of tandem silence, and Yuuri guessed that even without the sunset they would both burn the same crimson.

“Okay,” Viktor finally repeated.

“Okay,” Yuuri said for some reason.

Viktor leaned down, pressing their lips together so tentatively that tears almost spilled from the corner of Yuuri’s eyes. He could feel the emotion under Viktor’s skin, hear it in his breathing. And Yuuri could feel his own veins shake in his limbs, his own desires which once felt so carnal turning into something gaping and raw beneath Viktor’s touch.

“I’ll do the prep work then,” Viktor said in a soft voice. He began to slide down Yuuri’s body, trailing kisses over his skin the entire way. He peppered them down the center line of his abs, over his bellybutton, down both hipbones. Yuuri was so lost in the sparks of touch that it took him an extra second to react to Viktor gently spreading his legs. He huffed a breath near Yuuri’s cheeks.

“V-Viktor, you don’t have to do _that_.”

Viktor peered above the line of Yuuri’s body, “But you like this. And I like doing this.”

Yuuri bit down on his lip. It would always embarrass him, probably. Even if Viktor was right.

“I want… you to be as relaxed and ready as possible.”

 _He’s afraid of hurting me_.

Yuuri wasn’t afraid of the hurt. He had… come to know his body over the course of his adult life, and even more so since Viktor had crashed into it. But he didn’t want Viktor to panic or stress, so if Yuuri being exceptionally ready helped Viktor, he wouldn’t dare rush him.

“Alright,” Yuuri said, blinking down at him. “Then get to relaxing me.”

Viktor almost started at the sharp comment, but then he smiled, suddenly all mischief. He liked it when Yuuri showed no mercy; it was either competitiveness or masochism. Perhaps both.

Viktor’s gaze was soon lost beneath the horizon line of Yuuri’s body. He dipped his head low, gently guiding Yuuri’s legs wider as he pushed at his cheeks.

Yuuri allowed his head to sink into the pillow, willing himself to relax. Viktor ran his tongue over Yuuri’s entrance and Yuuri gasped. Even though he was mentally prepared it would always startle him. It was a gentle touch but something that could never be ignored; so hot and wet in such a sensitive place. It made his skin crawl and his cock throb, yearning for more.

The motion was repeated once, twice, until Yuuri wondered if Viktor was going to tease him until the sun went down. That's when there was a slight touch of thumbs near his entrance, delicately pulling him apart, and then the thrust of a tongue past his rim.

It was a hard sensation to describe. It was overwhelming and mind consuming for the moment it happened. Yuuri’s hips bucked without permission, his insides seemingly sliding out of tune with his outsides, veins trying to escape the confines of their limbs. It was an intrusion that snuck into him, stretching him only in the slightest and with the warmest and most pliable of touches. And yet it still was _inside_ him, tickling at his inner rim and making him jolt with reaction.

“ _Ah!_ ”

“ _Mmm_ ,” Viktor hummed before trying again, thrusting deeper.

It was malleable, so perfectly taunting and giving all at once. It made Yuuri crave more, made the base of his cock ache. Viktor pulled away, gave the rim a soft kiss, and then stuck just the very tip of spit-slick finger into him.

Yuuri began to yelp, but the noise turned into something begging. Viktor was only teasing at the rim, giving it the touch of almost-stretch without making it stretch at all.  

“Lube,” Viktor chirped brightly.

Yuuri smacked against the bedside table, only distantly understanding the outlines of drawers and handles. He found the bottle eventually, a bit slick on the outside, and tossed it at Viktor without hesitation.

Viktor was smiling as he poured it over his fingers, and when he took the small pressure away from Yuuri’s rim he almost whimpered.

“There there,” Viktor said, pressing his finger back to the entrance. Yuuri lifted his hips. Viktor chuckled.

He slid one finger in, slowly. Yuuri’s response was something like a satisfied sigh, a deeply breathed “ _Haaaah_ ,” as Viktor’s finger dove deeper.

It was slim and over-slick, barely an intrusion at all, but the friction against his rim made his body purr. Yuuri’s back arched, his hips pressing harder onto Viktor’s finger.

Viktor’s breath caught; it was loud enough that Yuuri could hear it, loud enough to garner his attention, so when Yuuri opened his eyes he was allowed to see the unbridled lust and adoration painted across Viktor’s face. He was looking at the stretch of Yuuri’s muscles and the arch of his back like it was the only thing in existence, like the universe began spinning around the flex of his hips and the hitch of his breaths.

Yuuri wasn’t sure how to react. He was overcome with _something_ \-- _everything?_ \-- and he stared at Viktor like the answer would appear on his face. Viktor shifted his gaze to him, making eye contact. Weirdly enough he didn’t say anything, didn’t change his expression. He simply pulled his finger out before sliding back in, curling it just in the slightest.

Yuuri didn’t take his eyes off him as his back snapped into an arch, as his chin lifted and panting breaths spilled from his chest. Once again, Yuuri was filled with the urge to let tears go. Maybe it was the openness, the toe to toe, eye to eye exchange of something wholly sensitive. Opening up had always been difficult for Yuuri, akin to digging one’s nails into the seam of a shell to squeak it open, afraid that it might break entirely in two. But now it felt like he was unfurling all on his own, no force necessary, baring whatever was inside to the only one he truly wanted to see it.

Viktor looked like he wanted to say something. He didn’t.

 _Look at everything I am. I love you._ Yuuri wanted to put voice to the words, but he couldn’t. It seemed inappropriate given that Viktor was in the middle of eating him out. Yuuri swallowed the thoughts, and eventually Viktor dipped down again, withdrawing his finger to replace it with his mouth.

The first couple licks and kisses were delicate. They were _aggravating_ , leaving Yuuri empty after he had finally gotten a taste of friction. It was mostly lips to entrance, mouthing at the rim without much force. Relaxation tumbled down down Yuuri’s body, following the descent of his spine. His muscles unraveled around each node, sinking heavier into the mattress. He was opening up for Viktor. His body was greedy, and Viktor’s devot mouthing at his puckered flesh was making him moan with new needs.

Eventually Viktor’s thumbs shifted and his tongue stiffened, pushing further into Yuuri’s body. Yuuri pressed himself against Viktor’s face as he moaned. It didn’t work like that, he knew he couldn’t ride Viktor’s tongue, but his body was still intent on trying.

Viktor growled against him, holding his hips tight with his hands and pushing in again.

Yuuri’s hand fisted in the blankets, “ _V-Viktor…_ ”

Viktor widrew his tongue, flicking at the rim before sucking. All of Yuuri’s nerves and sensations shot to that specific point in his body, jolting him into a pleasure filled yelp. Then there were fingers touching at the more forgiving entrance. Viktor pushed into him, this time with two fingers, his tongue still licking at the edge of his entrance.

Yuuri groaned, his back arching higher the deeper Viktor sank into him.

“Is that okay?” Viktor asked, completely aware that it was okay.

Yuuri rolled his hips, digging at the pressure to seek out more of it.

“ _Ah--_ ,” Viktor said, barely able to cover up his gasp. He delved further and then began following Yuuri’s rhythm, stroking prickling heat and sensation out of him with every movement.

Yuuri could ride him like this until he couldn’t last, until he pressed one too many times against his prostate and came. His nipples were frighteningly hard now, all of his skin aching for touch while his cock dripped in its silent and forsaken state.

“Yuuri, I’m going to add another.”

Yuuri nodded, bracing himself while trying not to brace himself. Going tense would help no one.

Viktor sucked at the flesh above his entrance and Yuuri had the compulsion to quickly pump his cock into orgasm. It was right there, that swelling need coagulating beneath Viktor’s lips. But he refrained, crying out instead. His noises were getting more scattered and unfocused. He was weak and unthinking, just a thrumming body of need. As Viktor sucked another finger pushed Yuuri wider, coercing him open.

Yuuri moaned as he stretched for him. The itching heat had turned into a full burn, the rim less inviting for the extra intrusion. But Viktor kept sucking, then licked once again at the rim, humming little praises into Yuuri’s flesh.

Yuuri’s legs were shaking but he remained calm. He focused past the burn to that trickle of pleasure creeping down his thighs and up to his cock. It was there, past the pain, if he could concentrate on it.

Viktor thrust in and out a few times. He was slow and careful, watching Yuuri’s face.

“Viktor,” Yuuri said, his body having finally given way to the third finger. “Please.”

Viktor licked at his rim a few more times, “Are you sure? Are you ready?”

“ _Yes_ ,” Yuuri breathed. “ _Please_.”

Viktor was staring at him-- checking his face for the truth, perhaps. But Yuuri knew the truth was there, written all over his damp parted lips and heaving chest, nested in the glazed heat of his eyes and the flush on his cheeks. Viktor seemed to agree, because his next exhale was acceptance, and it was shaky.

He crawled upward, gently abandoning Yuuri’s entrance, and looked down at him. Yuuri blinked at him a few times. His silver hair hung away from his face, baring the whole of his expression. His eyes were burning blue, watchful and glossy. Sweat had begun to mist across his forehead. He exhaled again, but this one almost sounded broken.

Yuuri tried not to let his face contort in shock. Viktor looked… almost scared. In fact, he might have looked a bit terrified.

Was Viktor more nervous than Yuuri?

Yuuri reached up, touching Viktor’s cheek. “It’s okay,” he said.

Viktor closed his eyes against the touch, leaning into it. How was this the most pure and innocent Yuuri had ever seen him?

“I know you’ll take care of me,” Yuuri said, brushing aside a strand of silver that had gotten trapped in sweat. “And I’ll take care of you.”

Viktor looked at him, expression receptive and soft, and nodded.

Yuuri reached to the side, grabbing and opening the condom that waited for them there. He reached down, rolling it over Viktor’s length with surprisingly steady hands. Viktor shuddered, his head dropping to guard his expression. He grabbed the lube himself, pouring it over an already slick hand and applying it to his length.

When he looked up again Yuuri started to feel the nervousness. His heart fluttered, stupid and out of time, and his fingers tingled anxiously. He spread his legs wider, lifting his hips, and wrapped his hands around Viktor’s neck and waist.

“You’re sure?” Viktor asked.

“Mm,” Yuuri nodded. “Are you sure?”

“Yes,” Viktor answered, voice hoarse.

“Okay,” Yuuri said. One of his hands slid downward, reaching for Viktor’s cock. When he found it he began to guide it, leading it to his rim. When the tip touched against him they both gasped. Yuuri nodded again, doing his best to assure Viktor. “I’m ready,” he stated again.

Viktor let his head tip forward, breathing against Yuuri’s cheek, “Tell me if you need me to stop.”

He began to push in, and Yuuri had to relearn how to breathe. The tip was fine; Yuuri parted around the plush flesh in a welcoming way. The tingle of sensation made him moan. Then it flared out, and Yuuri’s body stretched to accommodate the ridge. “ _Ah, that’s--_ ”

Viktor paused once the head was inside, his back already heaving. Yuuri held back his whimper as his body adjusted around the girth of Viktor’s shaft. It was so… hard. Unyielding. _Thick_.

He wanted to tell Viktor that it was okay to move, but he thought his voice might betray him. Instead he pressed on Viktor’s hip, pulling him closer. Viktor hesitated, but only for a moment. Then he sank deeper, sliding into Yuuri centimeter by centimeter.

Yuuri’s eyes could only widen. He was being forced open and filled all at once. The pressure inside him felt like the vacuum of space, something that crushed sound and air from existence. The deeper he sank the less oxygen Yuuri could take into his lungs, the emptier his head became. He was one pulsating and burning sensation around Viktor, existing almost solely to feel him.

“Are you okay?”

“Keep going,” Yuuri almost whimpered, eyes still peeled wide. There was something, something _right there_ that Yuuri needed, that Viktor needed to push past.

He obeyed, diving further albeit slowly, and suddenly Yuuri gasped, burning lungs filling with cold air and relief. He moaned, body gently writhing. His body was still in shock at the fullness, still teetering on the edge of convulsions, but now Yuuri could feel the sensations trembling into pleasure, trickling through him like an itch that needed scratched. Viktor was watching him with wide eyes and Yuuri simply dug his nails into his shoulders.

“More,” was his exhaled request.

Viktor rocked his hips forward, eyes still riveted to Yuuri’s face, and Yuuri groaned to the ceiling. There was still pain, still the sting of the stretch and the overwhelming pressure, but there was also something _so good_ . The gradual slide of Viktor into him, the way his rim clung and released to enjoy new slippery friction, the way Viktor felt _inside him_ , gliding and grazing against his insides. He kept going, as deep as he could, and blistering heat bubbled up to the surface of Yuuri’s skin, boiling from the feel of Viktor fully seated within him.

When he stopped they both gasped. Viktor was shaking, from the effort of holding back or the sensations of it, Yuuri wasn’t sure. But his shoulders quaked above Yuuri, his head hanging in the curve of Yuuri’s neck. Yuuri was still staring at the ceiling, unseeing. There wasn’t anything else like it. There was nothing like having someone inside you, with you, experiencing the same split open intimacy in the same moment. Yuuri was so full he felt he might burst. He was a vibrating chord around the strum and pluck of Viktor’s body. He felt if he stopped vibrating, if Viktor stopped playing, then he might go insane.

“Okay,” he breathed. He didn’t want to concentrate on the simple stretch and pressure of it. He wanted motion.

“Okay?” Viktor asked. Yuuri could tell he meant, ‘ _Are you okay?’_ , but he understood the lack of coherency.

“Yes,” Yuuri reassured him, “yes.”

Viktor nodded once, swallowing, and began to pull his hips back.

“ _A-Ah,_ ” Yuuri’s nails dug into Viktor’s shoulderblades.

Viktor was being cautious but it was still _so much_. Thousands of sensations combating one another, scraping through the most delicate parts of Yuuri’s body. Viktor reached down with a trembling hand and wrapped his fingers around Yuuri’s cock.

Yuuri groaned, trying desperately not to arch his back into the touch. His body relaxed at that, purring, wanting. It was a familiar touch and a familiar need.  

“I should have done that earlier,” Viktor huffed. He continued stroking over Yuuri as he pulled back, both done in slow, caring motions. When he rocked back forward Yuuri cried out.

“Bad?” Viktor asked with wide eyes.

“No no,” Yuuri said, patting his shoulder frantically. “Do that. I like that.”

The relief that washed over Viktor’s face was immense. He began thrusting, slowly, and Yuuri felt like his body was uncoiling and coming apart, unfurling into ribbons.

“ _God,_ ” he breathed, tipping his hips up just a little. “ _Viktor_.”

Viktor made a weak, weak noise. It was a growl that fell into a whimper. It was animal and soft, wanting in more than one way.

Viktor thread his free hand into Yuuri’s hair, kissing him everywhere. Neck and face and hair, eyelids and nose and lips. Yuuri caught his mouth, kissed him deeper, kissed him hard.

_I love you more than if you were a part of me, more than myself. I love you,_

Yuuri exhaled soft noises against Viktor’s lips. He should really tell him one day, in real words, out loud. But right now them together felt like everything, like there was understanding threaded through their twined limbs.

Pleasure was overtaking all the previous pain. The stretch was good, friction-hot sparks dragging from Yuuri’s rim and through his insides. They didn’t stop until they’d climbed the whole of his spine, cresting into shivers over his flesh. And they did climb, higher and higher, building tension between his legs, in his thighs, in the pit of his stomach.

“Viktor…” Yuuri tipped his head toward him again, aiming for a kiss. Viktor had been keeping his eyes averted, his head almost buried in Yuuri’s neck. He was shaking, and every now and then his hips bounced out of rhythm. It was a jolt to Yuuri, a delicious jolt that disrupted the rhythmic friction for a bright spark of pleasure.

“ _Viktor,_ ” he whisper just below his ear, placing a kiss there. “ _You feel so good inside me_.”

Viktor’s hand scrunched in Yuuri’s hair, his hips bucked, and he cried out Yuuri’s name as he came.

Yuuri gasped, back going into an arch, and the slightly harder snap of Viktor’s hips made all his sensations explode into color.

“ _Yuuri, Yuuri, ah--_ ” Viktor groaned, hips still thrusting forward in time to the waves of his orgasm.

Viktor was coming inside him, falling apart inside him, wrapped in Yuuri’s body. The thoughts hit Yuuri like a truck.

“ _Vi-Viktor--_ ” he was stammering, his mind was bleeding into white noise and static, and then he was coming.

He couldn’t control the snap of his hips this time, or the wail that left him. It broke off, almost devolving into a sob. His rim was clenching and unclenching around Viktor’s still-hard cock, and his own length was spilling thick and messy onto their stomachs. The feel of Viktor inside him as his body convulsed around him was _maddening_. It drove him to overstimulation almost instantly, his body still gripping at Viktor like a lifeline.

“Okay!” he almost barked, slapping at Viktor’s shoulder. His cock had finally stopped pulsing, and even though his rim still gave the random flinch Yuuri couldn’t deal with the sensations. The moment his orgasm rolled to a stop he felt like he couldn’t _breathe_ , like he was choking on fullness.

Viktor looked at him, eyes still hazy, and Yuuri pressed at his shoulder. “Please,” he begged in a broken voice.

It took Viktor a moment. Then he was pulling out. He did it so _slow._ Yuuri cursed in all the languages he knew, body squirming upward.

“Be careful,” Viktor chided him, steadying Yuuri’s hip with one hand.

Yuuri groaned as Viktor fully pulled out, immediately breaking into hard convulsions. He was so _empty_ and the sweat on his body was so _cold_.

“Here here,” Viktor said, sweeping a blanket over Yuuri’s body. Yuuri curled into a tight ball, gathering all his heat and senses together in one place.

“Are you okay?” Viktor asked after a moment.

“Snuglm.”

“... I’m sorry, what was that?”

“Snuggle Me,” Yuuri responded roughly.

There may have been a slight chuckle from Viktor’s general direction. Then he laid down, curling around Yuuri and pressing all their heat together. “This better?”

“Mm,” Yuuri said with a nod. “And I’m fine. Just cold.”

“Okay,” Viktor said, pressing his nose to the back of Yuuri’s neck.

There was a lot of silence. Yuuri fell asleep for a little, he thought. “Viktor?”

“Mm?”

“Was that… okay?”

Yuuri felt Viktor’s eyelashes scrape against his neck, but he didn’t speak. Then they closed again, and a long sigh left Viktor’s lungs, “It was… perfect.”

A blush fled over Yuuri’s cheeks. “You’re just flattering,” he said, even though he desperately wanted to believe him.

“No,” Viktor corrected. His voice was weighted with sleep. “I actually feel stupid.”

“Why?”

Viktor shifted behind him, “I worried so much. But it was going to be with you, so there was no way it would ever be anything less than incredible.”

Yuuri squeezed into a tighter ball.

“That said. Even with those standards… it was perfect.”

Yuuri closed his eyes.

“Was… for you…”

“Ditto.”

“What?”

“Ditto everything you just said.”

“That’s-- Yuuri that’s not fair!”

“It was perfect!” Yuuri cawed, throwing a glance behind him. He flopped back down, “I should have waited for you to ask, now I just look like I’m plagiarizing.”

Viktor laughed behind him, and Yuuri hoped that meant he believed him.

“It…” Yuuri’s eyes slid to the side in spite of no one being in front of him, “felt better… than I thought it would.”

There was a short silence, and then a cough as Viktor cleared his throat.

“What?”

“That sex toy in your luggage probably helped.”

Yuuri picked up his pillow and whacked Viktor in the face with it.

Viktor was laughing through the cotton and feathers, and when Yuuri pulled it away from his face blue eye twinkled up at him.

“I’m so glad,” he said, the most genuine look on his face that Yuuri had ever seen. “That you enjoyed it.”

Yuuri laid down on top of him, “I’m glad you enjoyed it too.”

“I’ll teach you to do the other way as well.”

Yuuri made a face, “I’m worried about hurting you… I mean I _want_ to try, but--”

“You won’t hurt me.”

“Mm…”

“You’re a very caring boy; I’m not worried.”

“Also a sadist,” Yuuri said, holding up a finger.

“Oh,” Viktor gasped, “too true! I’ll buy handcuffs right away.”

“ _Mmm_ ,” Yuuri hummed above his lips before giving him a quick kiss. “That wasn’t the point.”

“I know,” Viktor said, face split in a grin. “But I trust you.”

Yuuri pressed his forehead against Viktor’s, “I trust you too.”

Yuuri was inhaling the scent of Viktor’s hair and skin when Viktor finally said, “I… think we need to get back in the shower.”

“Only once I get the feeling back in my hands and feet,” Yuuri agreed.

“Wow! I’m really something aren’t I?”

“Yeah,” Yuuri said, poking at his cheek, “you’re _something_.”

“Aww, mean Yuuri!”

 _You’re the love of my life_.

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
>  
> 
> <http://suggestivescribe.tumblr.com/>


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